Tonight’s WWE Smackdown Live was held in Phoenix Arizona at the Talking Stick Resort Arena.
John Cena’s Return
What’s the best way to celebrate the birth of our nation? Why an Independence Day Battle Royal of course! But first, we have to hear from the WWE’s resident cheap pop king (since Mick Foley is no longer at RAW) John Cena. Cena came out full of patriotic energy right from the get go. The very first thing he did was encourage the crowd to let him know how they felt, regardless of the content of their chants. No one was going to bring Cena down tonight.
He first did the obligatory praise of the U.S., comparing America and Smackdown Live being as they are both lands of opportunity and places that were built on the backs of people from all walks of life. He continued on, responding to the superstars that were spreading “rumors” about him and his future in the WWE. Phrases such as “part-timer”, “gone Hollywood”, etc have been echoed by more than a few superstars and a decent amount of the WWE Universe.
He countered those critics with his typical, hardworking bravado that he is so famous for. He stated that if his time is limited in the WWE, that he would go out in a blaze of glory. That is why he is positioning himself as a free agent. He ran through the names of most of the top players from both RAW and Smackdown Live, concluding with “you line them up, and I’ll knock them all down” and “the franchise is back and the champ is here!”.
“Rusev udrya, Rusev machka“
This challenge was answered by the Bulgarian Brute Rusev! Rusev came out and immediately started to attack the way that Cena’s return was being handled compared to how his was. He complained that Cena’s return was met with two months of comeback commercials, where all his messages to the WWE regarding his own return were met with silence and ignored. Oh and what American holiday would be complete without someone from another country insulting ours? Rusev took plays out of the “I Hate America” heel handbook, calling the U.S. a joke and full of lies, just like Cena.
This gave Cena the chance to respond with a pro-America speech and a challenge to Rusev for a fight so that the WWE’s version of Captain America could defend our country’s honor. He suggested a good old fashioned flag match. Rusev said that he would not give in to typical U.S. bullying and would only wrestle in that match on his time and terms. To put the icing on Cena’s “Yay America Please Please Love Me” cake, Cena and the crowd bid farewell to Rusev with a “USA” chant.
Alright everyone, grab a hot dog, your favorite beer (better be Budweiser because ‘Merica!) and put the fireworks down before you hurt yourself. The…. Scrum Sports Smackdown recap…. is…. here! You can see me!
AJ Styles vs Chad Gable – Win It and You’re In It Match : Winner: AJ Styles
This match was made when Daniel Bryan spoke to both AJ and Chad regarding Kevin Owen’s protests against the two men having a chance to fight him for his title. His reasoning was that he had already beaten both men, and therefore did not deserve the honor to challenge him again.
The Good
I really like the idea of Chad Gable going on a singles run. He is extremely athletic, strong as all hell, and can really sell. Chad was able to hold his own with one of the best ever in this match. He reminds me of a young Scott Steiner, but I think that he might be even better than that if I’m being honest. His awesome performance was recognized by AJ as well. After the match AJ looked almost stunned at Chad’s talent, and gave him a sincere handshake of respect before exiting the ring.
The Bad
The theme of “The Good” unfortunately follows Chad into this section. The only thing I would be worried about with Chad Gable becoming a single’s wrestler would be that the WWE writers wouldn’t know what to do with him. Granted, he has a better chance of having decent writing behind him on Smackdown Live, but it’s still a legitimate worry. The other part of that is that Smackdown Live would have to find a place for Jason Jordan. I hope that the rumors that American Alpha is not breaking up are true……for now.
The Ugly
Nothing about this match stood out as ugly to me, except Gable’s Taz-like orange and black outfit. I know it’s a bit petty, but you are part of AMERICAN Alpha! You better rock those stars and stripes son!
Carmella/James Ellsworth Segment
Carmella and her emotional service pet James Ellsworth came out to address the WWE Universe regarding her win last week in the MITB rematch. She basically made a long winded speech that could easily be summed up as “You mad bro?” As she was talking about the power she now possessed and the threat that posed to Naomi, the arena felt the Glow and Naomi arrived.
After Naomi did her usual ring entrance, that also debuted her new glowing championship belt, she congratulated Carmella on her second win. She had a warning as well though. She told the new Miss MITB that regardless of the power she thinks she has, the champ has eyes in the back of her head and “The Glow is always on!”. After addressing Carmella, Naomi switched her focus to James “Ellsworthless”. She told him that when it comes to him, someone else has some things to say.
YES YES YES!
Daniel Bryan comes down to the ring showered with all the face love you can handle. He asked James “What am I going to do with you?” James began to answer but was quickly shut up being as this was an obvious rhetorical question. Daniel Bryan knew exactly what he was going to do, and then banned him from the arena for the second week in a row. Ellsworth mocked Bryan, saying “Oh no! How will I ever get back in?”. Bryan wasn’t done though.
He fined James $10,000 and suspended him as well. To really make the point hit home, he told the newly unemployed Ellsworth that if he did not leave immediately or broke any of these rules, Carmella would be stripped of her MITB contract. Obviously James’ relationship to Carmella is not that strong, as she rushed Ellsworth out of the ring in a panic.
Naomi vs Lana – Winner: Naomi
I’ll just do a regular recap here as the match was only seconds long, but had an interesting ending. Naomi beat Lana with a quick submission that would make Connor McGregor jealous. I was ready to write an all BAD section for this match, but then something happened that made the quick win make sense. After the match as Lana in the corner, looking pathetic and broken, Tamina Snuka entered the ring. Tamina gave Naomi a quick stare down and then turned her attention to Lana. She calmly but sternly told Lana to stand up. She repeated herself multiple times in the same tone until Lana responded. The two then walked out in silence to the backstage area.
This could possibly be the start of a very interesting story line. Tamina had not made many waves as a competitor, but there is no doubt she is tough. I’m guessing that she is going to take Lana under her wing and train her until she becomes a force to be reckoned with. This is a good thing for a few reasons. This will give Tamina something to do other than being obscure in the women’s division. This is a plus for Lana as well. If WWE Smackdown Live writers can do this right, they could show Lana in some hardcore training sessions that would give her legitimacy and make the WWE Universe really believe that she could be a threat. I like it.
The New Day vs Usos Rap Battle
If I did a recap it would just be quoting roasts without the passion behind it. So here you go. I do have to say that I think the Usos should have won for the single diss that they hit Xavier Woods with in round one. I won’t ruin it, but look for it there!
A short backstage scuffle between Shinsuke Nakamura and Baron Corbin has me worried that this is a program that is going to happen. Shinsuke was being interviewed when Baron Corbin does what he does best, jump people from behind. This was in response to Nakamura saying that Baron should be afraid of him. Nakamura was able to fight back after screaming “YES!” after Corbin asked him if he “looked afraid”. Referees broke them up and that was that.
Randy Orton vs Aiden English – Winner: Randy Orton
The Good
Aiden English did a great job in his heel role tonight. After being interrupted while singing a second time by Orton, he jumped Randy prior to their match starting. After he knocked Orton out of the ring, he told the Viper that “he wasn’t finished” and then promptly concluded his serenade. Good stuff there. He also did a good job selling the hell out of a very aggressive Orton.
The Bad and The Ugly
Jinder Mahal came out after the match and started spewing month’s old anti-American talking points. It’s always the same thing. “You” (and this could be anyone from the crowd, to Randy, to everyone at home) don’t respect me and hate me because of my skin color, home country, blah blah blah. It really is boring.
Tye and Tyler (Tenee Young) Breeze Interview
Once again, something by Breezango that is just too good to not watch. Drink it in mannnnnnnnn!
After this gold that Tyler Breeze bestowed upon us, the actual Renee Young interviewed Mike and Maria Bennet (I refuse this Kanellis stuff, I REFUSE!) As Mike and Maria elaborated a bit on their message of love, a large CLANG! of pipe dropping was heard of camera. As the camera focused in on the cause of the sound, we were shown a sheepish Sami Zayn stretching for his upcoming Battle Royal match.
Sami comes over and apologizes for interrupting the couple for the second week in a row. He then told them that he was a big fan of their “power of love” gimmick. He started to do the old Sami Zayn happy/go nowhere ramble, but his entrance music started to play and he made a quick exit.
Independence Day Battle Royal – Winner: AJ Styles
Highlights
-Dolph Ziggler being the first superstar eliminated. ( I thought Tyler Breeze had some legit backstage heat from WWE corporate. I wonder what Dolph did now)
-Tyler Breeze (still in Tenee Young wig and all) being caught in the arms of Fandango outside of the ring after being tossed out by Erick Rowan. The crowd loved it. This is the best bromance since J.D. and Turk from Scrubs. May it never end.
-Mojo eliminating Zack Ryder from behind after the two teamed up to eliminate Erick Rowan.
-Tye Dillinger putting on a perfect 10 performance. He was one of the final three superstars in the ring and really had me hoping beyond all hope that he would win the match. He took it to both AJ Styles and Sami Zayn at the same time. There was even a point where he almost eliminated both simultaneously. The biggest winner of the match was Dillinger, he got a real push with the writing of this match.
-Sami almost eliminating himself after missing a Helluva kick and the momentum taking him over the top rope. After some close calls between he and AJ, Styles was able to counter a suplex attempt by Zayn and knock him off the apron with a Pele kick.
After the match Kevin Owen’s came in to show Styles what he would be in for at Battleground. A short pummeling followed, then KO picked up AJ and to verbally embarrass him in front of the crowd. AJ answered with a Pele kick that stunned the New Face of America. AJ then went for a Styles Clash but the champion slid out of the ring. Owens unfortunately forgot his belt, which Styles raised above his head in victory to close the show.
