The WWE invades Saudi Arabia and brings all the bells and whistles of a major PPV event with them.
Match 1: HHH vs John Cena
16-time World Champion John Cena takes on 13-Time World Champion HHH in what amounts to an exhibition between veterans. Slow start, feeling each other out with tests of strength to further excite an already hot crowd. Good back and forth with signature moves to continue playing with the crowd. HHH reverses a “U can’t see me” attempt and delivers one of his own to mock Cena. Cena reverses a Pedigree attempt to regain control but gets caught trying to come off the top rope and we’re even again. John locks in an STF but can’t get HHH to submit. Cena hits a “Five Knuckle Shuffle” followed by an AA, but HHH kicks out at 2. HHH hits a Pedigree for a near fall on Cena. Cena tries again for the submission, HHH counters into a cross-face, Cena counters again into 2 back to back Attitude Adjustments to finally score the victory.
Winner: Cena
Nothing spectacular, but a solid way to start the show with a pair of veterans who know exactly how to fire up the crowd.
Match 2: Cruiserweight Championship: Cedric Alexander© vs Kalisto
They start by trading a series of quick back forth moves to establish both men as worthy contenders. After a brief trip outside the ring Kalisto puts Alexander back in the ring to attempt something from the top, but he gets caught and takes his own trip outside for a Suicide Dive from Alexander. More back and forth including a stunning drop kick from Alexander which resulted in the champ trying to wear down his challenger with some mat work. Kalisto escapes and picks up the pace for a while. Both men on top in the corner, countering each other’s attempts until Kalisto manages to hit a spring board Spanish fly for a near fall. Alexander counters Kalisto’s finisher into a Lumbar Check for the victory.
Winner and still Cruiserweight Champion: Cedric Alexander
Not the most exciting display given what we expect from the Cruiserweight Division, but a solid showing none the less.
Match 3: Raw Tag Team Titles (currently vacant): Woken Matt Hardy & Bray Wyatt vs The Bar
Hardy and Cesaro start the match amid “delete” chants from the crowd. Wyatt comes in with an impactful double team move. The Deleters of Worlds are in clear control and even take some time to applaud the crowd, but clever heel tactics turn the tide back in favor of the Bar. Sheamus and Cesaro keep Hardy isolated as he desperately tries to reach his partner. A “Side Effect” finally allows Matt to make the hot tag to Bray who comes in like a wrecking ball. Sheamus wants a Brogue Kick, but the Woken ones stop him with a Sister Abigail, followed by their new double team finisher.
Winners and new Raw Tag Champions: The Deleters of Worlds, Matt Hardy and Bray Wyatt
The result of this match was never really in question considering how little sense it would have made for the Bar to win the Raw titles now that they have been moved to Smackdown in the recent Superstar Shake Up. It will be fun to see the Deleters continue to grow as a team.
Match 4: United States Championship: Jeff Hardy© vs Jinder Mahal w/Sunil Singh
Mahal starts aggressively but ends up outside the ring. Hardy runs along the barricade to leap onto Mahal, but Singh interferes to give the advantage back to an angry Mahal. The crowd is firmly against the Modern-day Maharaja. Hardy misses a Whisper in the Wind; however, Mahal sells the move anyway in an awkward moment that the announcers attempt to cover. Jinder tries to set up for his finisher, but Jeff counters into a Twist of fate. He follows it up with a Swanton from the corner to successfully hang on to the title.
Winner and still United States Champion: Jeff Hardy
I’m starting to get the feeling that since some of these guys are pulling double duty by also being in the 50-man Rumble that they are maybe saving something during their singles matches.
Byron Saxton leaves the commentary table to join the preshow panel for a break in the action. Perhaps this is the prayer break that I heard they were going to need to take as an intermission during the show? They throw to a package about Saudi Arabia followed by a backstage interview with the returning Chris Jericho. After another backstage interview, this one with Daniel Bryan, they throw back to ringside for more in ring action.
Match 5: Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Bludgeon Brothers© vs The Usos
Jey Uso and Erik Rowan start the match trading blows until Rowan establishes his advantage. Rowan and Harper make frequent tags, keeping Jey isolated from his brother. Jimmy comes in hot and takes control. Usos double teaming Harper in the corner, cut off Rowan from reentering the fray, and hit a big splash on Harper for a near fall. Bludgeon brothers regain control by firing each other up with slaps then use their assisted power slam finisher for the victory.
Winners and still Smackdown Tag Champs: The Bludgeon Brothers
Somewhat short, but definitely hard-hitting match as you would expect from these two teams. Considering how early it is in the Bludgeon Brothers dominant new title reign it was right that they retain in such dominant fashion.
Match 6: Intercontinental Title Ladder Match: Seth Rollins© vs Finn Balor vs The Miz vs Samoa Joe
After clearing the ring, Rollins is the 1st to put his hands on a ladder, however after a scuffle involving all 4 participants Joe is the man who actually puts it in the ring. Joe remains in control until Balor manages to drop him on his back on top of the ladder. Balor gets the ladder up in and starts to climb but is stopped by Miz. Then it’s Rollin’s turn to stop a climb, and now Finn and Seth are dueling atop the ladder. In come the other two men to shove over the ladder and ensure both men fall. Joe is back in control now, using the ladder as a weapon to weaken each of his opponents. Sling Blade by Balor, followed by a drop kick into the ladder. Finn climbs for the Coup de Gras, but Rollins stops him and Joe gets back up and turns it into a superplex on both of the faces. Miz hits a Skull Crushing Finale onto the ladder against Joe and now has the ring to himself to try for the win. Rollins up the other side of the ladder but dropped by Miz. Balor replaces Seth and battles with Miz atop the ladder. Miz comes away with the advantage until Balor turns the tables and hits a Coup de Gras on Miz while he’s laying on the folded ladder. Balor and Joe battle for control of the ladder. Finn is close to the top of the ladder when out of nowhere Rollins leaps above him and grabs the title for the win.
Winner and still IC Champ: Seth Rollins
Relatively tame as ladder matches go, but anytime these 4 men are in the ring it’s guaranteed to be entertaining. Since 2 of them are now on Smackdown instead of Raw, it’ll be interesting to see what new feuds they get themselves into.
Package about the talent tryouts held this past week in Saudi Arabia, followed by the introduction of the 4 men selected to join WWE at the Performance Center. The interview is interrupted by the Daivari brothers waving an Iranian flag. The brothers proceed to cut a heel promo on the new recruits, pushing them until they fought back and got to be heroes in front of their hometown crowd.
Match 7: WWE Championship: AJ Styles© vs Shinsuke Nakamura
Back and forth tie ups to start the pace relatively slow while Nakamura tries to goad Styles into losing his cool. Nakamura brilliantly playing up his newly unleashed heel persona as he takes control of the match for an extended period. AJ able to recover enough to get fired up by the very vocal crowd, but it doesn’t last long. Shinsuke wants a Kinshasa, but AJ counters into a Calf Crusher. Nakamura makes it to the ropes to break the hold, but the damage may be done. He continues to favor his leg throughout the remainder of the match, selling that damage. Elbows being traded in the center of the ring until Nakamura tries to transition into an armbar. Styles resists and doesn’t allow his opponent to fully lock in the submission. AJ almost accidentally takes out the ref allowing Nakamura to hit an unseen low blow and go for a cover. Styles breaks it up by grabbing the ropes. Both men now outside and battling at ringside including the christening of the new Saudi announce table. The ref counts out both men, but they continue battling on the outside.
Result: Double Count out, Styles retains via Champions Advantage
A good display of the continually growing rivalry between 2 of the greatest in ring performers of our time. This is only just the start of this feud, and that’s just fine.
Match 8: Casket Match: Undertaker vs Rusev w/Aiden English
Taker starts by staring down at the casket and asking that it be opened. Rusev responds by jumping out of the ring. Taker brings the fight to him by following him around the ring and engaging the battle. Rusev does manage to get in a few blows which are quickly answered and followed with Old School. Rusev again retreats out of the ring for a pep talk from English. Taker bounces Rusev’s head off of the announce table before sending him back into the ring and asking again for the casket to be opened. Rusev is rolled into the casket, but English prevents Taker from closing it long enough for Rusev to climb out. Rusev takes control long enough to go for an Accolade, but when he turns to ask that the casket be opened Taker sits up and regains control. Chokeslam. Rusev thrown into the casket again. English in for the distraction gets a chokeslam and a Tombstone of his own. Taker proceeds to put English in the casket with Rusev and close it on both of them.
Winner: Undertaker
No one expects a barn burner from Taker at this stage in his career, but he got in his signature moves in front of an international audience and Rusev Day, even in defeat, gets a nice spotlight for all the great character work they’ve been doing lately.
Match 9: Universal Championship Steel Cage Match: Brock Lesnar© w/Paul Heyman vs Roman Reigns
Suplex #1. Suplex #2. Suplex #3. Suplex #4. F5 #1. No offense from the challenger, until he escapes another F5 attempt for 3 Superman Punches in a row. Roman trying to climb over the top, but Lesnar catches him by the vest and pulls him back in. Lesnar trying to climb, but Reigns catches him and delivers a power bomb. (Samoa Joe watching on from the back) Roman throwing Lesnar against the cage. Spear #1. Spear #2. Spear #3. Roman covers for a 2 count. Reigns attempting to walk out the door, but Heyman slams it closed on him. Brock follows up with F5#2. Lesnar takes off his gloves and prepares a chair but gets caught instead with Spear #4. Now Reigns has the chair and proceeds to bend it across Brock’s back. Superman Punch. Spear #5 goes through the cage with both men ending on the floor. Officials rule that Brock hit the floor 1st and is therefore the winner.
Winner and still Universal champ: Brock Lesnar
Interesting. Where the heck are they going to go with this now?
Match 10: The Greatest Royal Rumble:
Daniel Bryan enters at #1 followed by Dolph Ziggler at #2. They will start the match with the next participant entering every 90 seconds until all 50 men have entered the ring. They battle close to the ropes attempting to get an early elimination. Entrant #3 is Sin Cara who goes after both Ziggler and Bryan. Sin Cara eliminated by Ziggler. Bryan and Ziggler continue attempting to eliminate one another until Curtis Axel enters at #4. Newly crowned Hall of Famer Mark Henry comes in at #5 and immediately puts Axel out of the ring. Out at #6 is Mike Kanellis, but Henry eliminates him immediately for what might be a new record for shortest stint in a Rumble. Entrant #7 is a sumo wrestler named Hiroki Sumi. Sumi and Henry have a classic big man stare down, and Henry succeeds at eliminating Sumi. Bryan and Ziggler take advantage of Henry’s distracted state to eliminate him.
The next man to join the fray is Viktor of the Ascension, but he’s eliminated by Bryan before Kofi Kingston’s music plays as #9. #10 is Cruiserweight Tony Nese, followed at #11 by the Revival’s Dash Wilder. This is the most men that have accumulated in the ring thus far, but there are 39 left to enter so we have a long way to go yet. Hornswoggle?! Swoggle pulls Wilder from the outside to assist in eliminating him before getting in the ring. Swoggle bites Ziggler before being knocked out of the match by Nese. The Rarely seen lately Primo Colon enters at #13. Xavier Woods is the 2nd member of the New Day to join, and now they have an advantage. Tony Neese tries dancing with the New Day, but they pick him up and throw him out.
Bo Dallas at #15. Hall of famer and Raw GM Kurt Angle is the next man to enter the Rumble. Angle eliminates Dallas and Colon before taking a super kick from Ziggler. Ziggler gets eliminated as payback. Next man in is the other half of the revival, Scott Dawson. #18 is Goldust. Bryan teetering on the edge of elimination taking strikes from Goldust. Konnor in at #19. It’s time to Walk With Elias! Elias does his schtick down the ramp then jumps in to eliminate Konnor, Woods, and Kofi all at once.
Luke Gallows out next. Yes kicks from Bryan to Angle. Ankle lock and Angle slam on Bryan then Elias sneaks up to eliminate Angle! #22 is Rhyno. Daniel Bryan, #1, has been in the 30 minutes at this point. Drew Gulak is up next. Gulak and Dawson trading hard chops. NXT’s Tucker Knight is in at 24, and he takes out Gulak. The halfway mark is Glorious with the entrance of Bobby Roode. Goldust had been doing well but was eliminated by Roode. Somehow Dawson eliminates himself? Fandango is # 26. Elias avoids being eliminated by 3 men. Next up is Chad Gable and he shows his power by lifting the big Tucker Knight onto his shoulders.
It’s the return of Rey Mystero at 28, and he removes Gallows from the match. Mysterio going after all of the big men. Former Andre Memorial winner Mojo Rawley is out and the 1st thing he does is remove Fandango from the party. D-Bry is still here by the way. Tyler Breeze is entrant #30. Mojo tries to take him out, Dango catches him and puts him back in, but then Mojo puts him out for good.
Big E is in next, but unfortunately, he’ll be on his own since his partners were eliminated earlier. He offers pancakes to Tucker Knight, but then gives him a Big Ending and tosses him out instead. Karl Anderson at #32. Mysterio hits 619 on Roode. Apollo Crews in at 33 and eliminates Chad Gable. NXT’s Roderick Strong is here and hitting back breakers on everyone. Rhyno is out. 13-time WWE champ Randy Orton strolls to the ring next to the sounds of a cheering crowd. RKO on Crews. Anderson out. Mojo out. Crews out. Heath Slater is here for his kids, y’all.
NXT prospect Babatunde is here for international flavor. Another former Andre winner is in next with Baron Corbin. He starts by pulling Elias under the ropes and throwing him into the ring steps. Corbin hits a deep six on Mysrterio then eliminates both Roode and Strong. Titus O’Neil trips on his way to the ring and slides UNDER the ring. The announcers can’t stop laughing.
Another NXT prospect is in now with Dan Matha. We haven’t seen much of him on TV yet, but he was heavily involved in the tryouts that were held in Saudi Arabia this week. Oh yeah. Bryan is still here. A lot of people won’t be for much longer as Braun Strowman is #41. Babatunde is actually bigger than Strowman, but that doesn’t stop him from being eliminated. Then Matha. Then Big E. And then Slater. The perfect 10 is #42, but he doesn’t last long. Eliminations happening fast and furious and hard to keep track of at this point. They include Titus, Dillinger, Mysterio, Corbin and Orton.
Strowman and Elias having an impressive showdown while left alone in the ring. Bobby Lashley is #44. Elias is out after 35 minutes, and now it’s Strowman vs Lashley. Daniel Bryan is still here and taking it to both big men. Here comes the Great Khali at #45. Braun and Bobby team up to throw him over. #46 Kevin Owens joins Daniel Bryan, Braun Strowman and Bobby Lashley in the ring. Bryan now has the record for longest time spent in a Rumble at 1 hour 5 minutes and still counting.
Next out is Smackdown commissioner Shane McMahon for a showdown with his former rival Owens. Bryan and Shane have a brief stare down before joining in some tandem Yes Kicks on KO. Shelton Benjamin is #48. Owens tries to unite everyone against Strowman, but they don’t succeed before Big Cass enters at 49 and goes straight for Bryan. Most of the men continue the assault on Braun, but he goes under the rope instead of over.
Chris Jericho is #50, and KO is on his list. Benjamin eliminated. Jericho is still focusing much of his attention on Owens until he’s hit with a big boot by Cass and eliminated. Shane goes up to try hitting Coast to Coast on Owens, but Strowman returns to the action in time to throw him off onto the announce table. He then takes out Lashley and Owens. Bryan is trying to put Strowman over, but Big Cass hits him with a Boot for the elimination. We’re down to Cass and Strowman.
Winner: Braun Strowman
Order of Entry: Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, Sin Cara, Curtis Axel, Mark Henry, Mike Kanellis, Hiroki Sumi, Viktor, Kofi Kingston, Tony Nese, Dash Wilder, Hornswoggle, Primo Colon, Xavier Woods, Bo Dallas, Kurt Angle, Scott Dawson, Goldust, Konnor, Elias, Luke Gallows, Rhyno, Drew Gulak, Tucker Knight, Bobby Roode, Fandango, Chad Gable, Rey Mysterio, Mojo Rawley, Tyler Breeze, Big E, Karl Anderson, Apollo Crews, Roderick Strong, Randy Orton, Heath Slater, Babatunde, Baron Corbin, Titus O’Neil, Dan Matha, Braun Strowman, Tye Dillinger, Curt Hawkins, Bobby Lashley, Great Khali, Kevin Owens, Shane McMahon, Shelton Benjamin, Big Cass, Chris Jericho
Order of Elimination: Sin Cara, Axel, Kanellis, Sumi, Henry, Viktor, Wilder, Hornswoggle, Nese, Dallas, Primo, Ziggler, Konnor, Woods, Kingston, Angle, Gulak, Goldust, Dawson, Gallows, Fandango, Breeze, Knight, Gable, Rhyno, Anderson, Rawley, Crews, Roode, Strong, Babatunde, Matha, Big E, Slater, O’Neil, Dillinger, Mysterio, Corbin, Orton, Hawkins, Elias, Khali, Benjamin, McMahon, Lashley, Owens, Jericho, Bryan, Cass
I’m exhausted….
Vince McMahon and a member of Saudi Arabian royalty are in the ring to present Braun with the trophy and the belt. Fireworks, and good night
